I can't remember where or when I read this but I saved it to my phone and I have read over it many times and it still amazes me how God works through people that we as humans would not expect to be able accomplish anything great because of their pasts or their hang ups.
"I'm not perfect. I have all kinds of problems. I have no ability. I have no gifts. I'm just not worthy.
Why would God want me?
Well, did you know that:
Moses stuttered.
David's armor didn't fit.
Timothy had ulcers.
Hosea's wife was a prostitute.
Jacob was a liar.
David had an affair.
Solomon was too rich.
Jesus was too poor.
Abraham was too old.
David was too young.
Peter was afraid of death.
Lazarus was dead.
John was self-righteous.
Naomi was a widow.
Moses was a murderer.
Jonah ran from God's will.
Gideon and Thomas both doubted.
Jeremiah was depressed and suicidal.
John the Baptist was a loudmouth.
Martha was a worry-wart.
Noah was a drunk.
Did I mention that Moses had a short fuse? So did Peter, Paul - well, lots of folks did."
So to answer the question: Why would God want me?
God wants you because he LOVESyou no matter what you have done or will ever do and if you are willing (notice, no where does it says you have perfect, just willing) God can and will use you to do some pretty amazing thing!
For those of you that know Chris and I personally you know that we have had our first baby's name picked out for over 8 years now but for those of you that aren't aware we will be naming our baby (boy or girl):
Chris
went to the doctor to get everything check again before I started the next
round of pills (clomid) and the test results came back that even though everything
was in the clear for him last time, now things aren't working anymore.
So
now neither one of us "work" :'(
We've decided that we are just going to let it go and start the adoption
process and if I get pregnant along the way even better and if not we will
still have a baby.
I was pretty emotional at first and every now and then I have down days but at
the same time
I've never felt an overwhelming peace like this about any
decision before.
God's
got a plan!
Depending on insurance stuff Chris will probably go to the doctor again at some
point but for now we are taking time for us and listening for what God has for
us!
We want to adopt an infant so we are looking into many different adoption
agencies (through the state, out of the country as well as private agencies).
We feel so clueless and want to make sure we are headed in the right direction so
we are doing lots of research.
THANK YOU to everyone for all the prayers and support!
Please keep them coming!
We
Love Y'all!
“Commit to the Lord whatever you do and he will establish
you plans.” – Proverbs 16:3
I have to admit Chris and I are pretty addicted to our phones. I use mine for texting, calling, devotions, Facebook, twitter, instagram, candy crush, it's my calender, it's my alarm, emails (work and personal), it where I put things I don't want to forget, and the list goes on . . . I use it a LOT!
The other evening Chris and I were getting ready for bed. I was sitting in bed messing around on my phone and Chris was brushing his teeth.
When he finished he looked at me and said, "Okay, I want us to try something new. Whenever we are both home together our phones are off limits. The only reason we can use is if it's an important phone call or text or work related(and just CAN'T wait)!"
So that was the plan. We have had our phones pretty much off each evening for the past 3 days and it has been great! We are able to talk to each other and spend time together distraction free.
When Chris 1st suggested it he said we should just try to for a week but I at this point I don't know any reason for going back.
Over the past year and a
half, especially since I filled everyone in on what’s going on, I have gotten a
LOT of “advice”. Some of it was great advice from people who have been or who
are in my shoes, some OK advice from people who are a friend of a friend of
someone who has been in my shoes and then there is that downright bad advice.
*Please know that I am not singling anyone out and I truly do appreciate the
prayers and the words of encouragement so Please Don’t be offended by anything
you read*
Bad Advice:
1. “Maybe this is God’s way of saying he doesn’t want you to be a mom!”
Yes, someone REALLY told me that! As a Christian I know that God has a plan for
my life and clearly that plan is that I am not going to be a mom right now but
I also believe that God would not give me such a strong desire to be a mom if
that was not part of his plan for my life.
“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart!”
– Psalm 37:4
OK Advice - this is definitely not bad advice but I have heard a LEAST 100,000
times in the past year and a half . . .
1. “stop trying, it will happen”
2. “I have a friend of a friend who adopted and as soon as they got their baby
she got pregnant!”
3. “Don’t worry”
4. “My second cousin’s sister’s friend took that same medicine and she got
pregnant right away, it will work for you!”
No, this is not bad advice but it’s the Go-To responds when people find out you
are having trouble conceiving. Yes, every now and then I need the reminder to
not worry so much but “stop trying and it will happen” is kind of hard when you
have to keep track of meds and such and it is one thing if you are dealing with
or have dealt with this personally but hearing about your “second cousin’s
sister’s friend” is not helpful.
Great Advice:
1. ______________________________ (notice, NOTHING! Just listening, wiping
tears and a good ole fashion hug)
2. “I am praying for you”
3. “Write a letter to your future child each month!”
4. “It’s okay to be angry!”
These are just a few but Definitely the BEST advice I have received. Venting
while Chris or friends sit and listen with a box of tissues and wrap their arms
around me and knowing that I have people who truly care about Chris & I and
are praying for us has brought me more comfort than I can even begin to express.
Taking the time to write a letter each month for our future child has also been
a great way for me to relax and focus on God’s plan, not mine!
Lastly, #4 might seem strange but as Christians I think we often forget that it
is okay be get angry but it is not okay to let your anger consume you.
Thankfully Chris is willing to sit up at all hours of the night when I need to
get out all my frustrations so that the anger I feel at times will not consume
me.
“In your anger do not sin, Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry”
– Ephesians 4:26
Like I said before I did not
write this offend anyone and if I happen to list something you may have said
before as “OK Advice” please know that just knowing that you truly care means
the world to us even if you don’t know how to express it!
SIDE NOTE:
I have a doctor appointment next month and I'll most likely be switching
meds.
Thank you so much for all that you blessed us with. Thank you God so much for giving me a husband that does everything he
can to support me and comfort me and for my friends that always seem to
know what to say to make me smile even when I feel miserable.
God, whether I am going to carry our child and bring it into this world or whether we get to meet him or her after it is already here I pray that you are holding our sweet baby in your arms and protecting it until we are privileged enough to hold it ourselves.
More than anything I wish that I was holding my baby today but that's not the case so until that day does comes I need you to hold me and bring me comfort and peace and patience.
Amen.
Carry You
- Wavorly
Listen, the silence that is building all around you, surrounds you
You can't win, abandoned by the ones that you believed in
You need it
You're fading, I see your heart is breaking
but if you'd let me I would
Take the world off your shoulders
I'll run away
I'll carry you
Take the world off your shoulders
When you can't carry on
I'll carry you
I'll carry you
Moments, the world will crumple under like a landslide
You can't hide and you know it
You looked for all the answers that you can't find on the inside
You're fading, I see your heart is breaking
but if you'd let me I would
Take the world off your shoulders
I'll run away
I'll carry you
Take the world off your shoulders
When you can't carry on
I'll carry you
I'll carry you
When you can't carry on
I'll carry you
When you can't carry on
I'll carry you
I will run
I will run
I will run
I will run away
I'll take the world off your shoulders
When you can't bear the weight
When you can't carry on
Oh when you can't carry on
I'll carry you
